Bad Love

whenever a heterosexual couple decides to be together and tie the knot, many women feels that they are entitled to a diamond ring and a romantic proposal.

after both got their dream wedding, the wives wants the men to work harder to bring back more dough so their livestyle can be “improved”. the men may get angry as they feel that they should be entitled to docile wives, waiting for them to come home from work, with comforting dinner and a warm bath.

then more demands follows. more holidays, intimacy, less time with own friends, children, cars..

on top of those tangible demands, the couple also demand for non tangible expectations from the partners. better temper, more patience, and even loyalty.

and when one don’t get the above mentions, war breakout. fights, quarrels, infidelity, depressions. finger-pointing and shouting occurs.

the truth is, in a relationship, demands shouldn’t occur at all. loyalty and respect should be mutual.

you may ask,”but she screamed at me for no reasons all the time.” or “he sleeps around while i am busy taking care of the children.” or “he physically abuses me”

a lot of people forget that we have a choice. or rather, we had a choice. we chose this person to be our partner, didn’t we? so what are we complaining about?

“but he/she wasn’t like this before we got married.”

no matter how hard i try to justify, the finger always points back to me.








As They Aged

My grandaunt had fallen in February this year and suffered a stroke. Since then, she was unable to move much.

When I was at her place, her 3 children were there as well. They hired a therapist to help massage their mother. They were also there to provide assurance and comfort to her.

The sight was touching as nowadays, more often than not, when elderly are seriously ill, many of their children may push their responsibilities to one another. It is a rare sight to see children work together to take care of their aging parents.

This led me to think that why some children can take care of their sick parents while some can’t.

We’ve to accept that one day, more likely than not, they will fall sick. Alzheimer’s disease, kidney failure, cancer, stroke, diabetes, paralysis, etc. There’s a long list of illnesses that elderly may be prone to being affected. When the day comes, what will you do?

Will you still be able to pursue your holiday plans? Will you have enough financial strength to support them? Will you have the time to visit them often to provide them the encouragement they need? Will you be able to accompany them to the hospital?

Will your desires and personal goals be placed ahead of your parents’ well-being? Will you be “too busy”?

Nonethethless, I do understand that every family background is different.

Whatever our choice is, never forget that what we do, our children are watching.


Cheating is widely unaccepted in most cultures. It can cause a wide range of consequences. And if you are one of those who’s about to cheat, listen to my 4 advices before you make your decision:

1. Think of the consequences

Divorce? Breakup? Shame? Guilt? Financial loss? You may have your moments of pleasure but at what cost? Smart people weigh the pros and cons. Have you?

2. How long can you hide?

Assuming you really can hide your secret forever, what about having to live the rest of your life in a lie. A lie to your children. A lie to your parents. A lie to your colleagues. And most importantly, a lie to the person who trusts you and loves you the most.

3. The stress of keeping up the act

Imagine the constant worry everytime the phone rings infront of your partner. Or everytime your partner uses your phone, surf the net, take a photo, etc. 

4. Fatal Attraction

If the above 3 points haven’t bother you yet, my last advice is to go watch the 1987 film starting Michael Douglas and Glenn Close, Fatal Attraction.

A moment of folly, a lifetime of guilt. We know how’s it like when temptation comes knocking at our door. But the next time they really come, think of the 4 advices above before committing into it.

1st Marriage Anniversary

Anniversary dinner

Yesterday was my 1st marriage anniversary. My wife and I went out for a simple dinner at the Japanese restaurant and caught Alien: Convenent after that.

It was a meaningful night as we reminiscent our memories and discussed our future.

Reflecting on the past 1 year, here’s 3 key lessons I have learned:

1. Communication

Communication will always be the key to a healthy relationship. And the first step to communication is putting down our electronic devices and give our 100% attention to our partners.

2. Patience

A lot of times, our partner will come home sulking after a bad day in the office. And most of the time, we will bear the full brunt of it for no good reason. At this time, the true test of it is to hold our razor tongue and be patient to our partners. One day, they’ll appreciate your understanding.

3. Being There For Them

In a relationship, “no time” is a virus. Everytime we use it, our relationship deteriorates. It’s always about time management and prioritising. Our partner needs our companionship. To share their joys with them and give them a shoulder during bad times.